Tell Tale Signs I'm Middle Aged #13

I've grown into my bum. I've always had one, if you know what I mean - when I was seventeen, I had a perfect hour glass figure (38, 28,38) but kept telling myself that I was fat. Looking back I really couldn't have been, I mean, I was training for four hours a day six days a week. What I was, was curvaceous. But you can't tell a teenager anything can you?

Now I know I'm middle aged because all the sand has settled in the bottom of the hourglass! The difference is that I'm ok with that, it's my bum and I've had fun growing it. It's the sign of a good half life well lived. No longer do I care if my 'bum looks big in this'. If it does? Get a size bigger - oh and under no circumstances wear: leggings, jeggings, hotpants, cut-off shorts with tights, etc etc I am embracing my middle age with gusto and soon I will be moving into twin set and pearls, and sturdy, sensible shoes and plaid skirt - classic and timeless. Need to work on my old lady beard too...